Um. . .huh. I feel a bit odd.

More to the point, I have a "What's real?" feeling. The kind of feeling wh/ pushes me to question reality, sanity, & such.

A TV show helped induce this feeling. Buffy, the Vampire Slayer to be more exact. Tonight's episode questioned whether the whole series has really happened or whether Buffy has made the whole story and multiverse up as a schizophrenic illusion for the last six years (wh/ would somewhat put a crimper on Angel).

I haven't fallen to far into the feeling. I rather find it more of a curiosity, something th/ I keep in the back of my mind & soul. Something th/ transcends the mind & body. In a sense, it doesn't warrant extremely tons of attention b/c I don't know where to start for answers. And frankly, it gets somewhat scary if I think too hard about it.

One day, though, I may just use this type of plot device in a novel or movie or something. I don't find it terribly original. I remember coming across the plot device in I am Cheese or something like th/ by some guy w/ the last name Cormier. I toyed w/ the idea when I started seriously writing the novel on wh/ I've worked for years on by now. I also remember seeing it used in Jacob's Ladder & Vanilla Sky. All in all, nothing amazingly original.

But literary-directed stuff works pretty cool when it comes to the point of lacking originality. I have some BS babble here, but whatever: I remember walking around Boston one day w/ this guy in a suit who mentioned th/ he remembered someone saying th/ only 12 literary plots actually exist. Not sure if I agree w/ th/ point or not, but it makes a grounding point on wh/ to start working. I'll leap to the end b/c I don't have much concentration @ the moment (late @ night & soon time for bed).

Essentially it all comes down to how well the execution of the non-original element comes off. Tonight, Joss Whedon & the other writers & producers & directors of Buffy pulled off the whole shizo-hallucination "what's reality?" plot device quite well. Then again, they had backed it up w/ five seasons of a series th/ has tons of emotional depth & character development then backed it up w/ a season of characters reaching the bottoms of dark, wet holes, wh/ pushes them to ask, "Do I want this to be real?" So in the long run, it got executed well b/c of how these characters & themes get built up then get toppled down into crazy randomness th/ pretty much negates everything else happening around the characters.

And the end. . .To keep it short: I feel good yet annoyed @ not having the question of "What is real?" in the Buffyverse answered. Not just so the series can continue to get broadcasted, but so I don't feel cheated. I don't want either world negated & made pointless. For Buffy to just fight her way out of a schizophrenic hallucination w/out any repercussions feels cheap, especially since she had such bonds w/ filled out characters in the hallucinations. @ the same time, having the other more "real world" not exist feels as if it happened just for the sake of an episode -- wh/ I guess I could accept, but I rather like the complications & new choices introduced by having in the mind th/ this world we watch on the series might not really happen, but just be a hallucination w/ much more to it than what gets introduced in the crazy day-to-day demon fighting episodes. It makes the show feel that much more richer & somewhat hopeful in the sense th/ maybe, just maybe magic might just exist in the "real" world. . .or something to th/ effect. Or maybe it sounds bttr to say th/ reality might just prove more complicated than the things that we see & feel around & in us.

Wow. I babbled, & it makes me feel a bit odd th/ I babbled abt all of the stuff above.

I think I'll take this cue to say two things: happy to see th/ this show can go to such lengths to seriously not take itself seriously.

And goodnight.